This weekend left me and a Persian rug on the wrong side of the risk vs. reward equation. I took a risk, and it was wrong. So wrong. It was a debacle. The short version of the story is: for 2 years I’ve been searching for the perfect rug for my living room. I ran across a gorgeous rug in the perfect size and perfect colors (so I thought) at an estate sale on Saturday. I took the rug home, which was no easy feat. The rug weighs about 2x as much as I do. Through 30 minutes of whining and wailing (on my part), a wrist injury and aching muscles (also me), my husband and I finally lugged it through the front door. We moved all the furniture out, laid out the rug, and put everything back. I hate it. I loathe it. And I have been depressed about it for days. It was a great deal as far as a high quality rug like this goes; however, not a good deal for something that I want to light on fire. But that’s where I am with this rug. My husband’s encouraging words were, “Maybe it will look better at night.”
Even so, I really feel what hurts (yes, deeply hurts) me the most is not the money (although very, very hurtful) but that my instincts failed me so epically. I usually have a great eye for things. I can see something in a store and know if it’s perfect or not. I can match colors in my head, and I can identify something that fits into my vision. Don’t get me wrong, I test paint colors and check fabric swatches, but I’m usually pretty close. I have a nearly impeccable record with this – until now. It’s really messing with me.
This rug tricked me. The rug in my living room is not the rug that I bought. I see it and think, “who would ever have thought a rug like this could look good in this room!?” and so does everyone else. Well, back off people! This rug is an evil witch that cast a spell on me, took my money, pulled a muscle in my back, and transformed into a green and pink monster that looks like it is trying out for a Lilly Pulitzer shop.
It’s a genuinely beautiful rug, as harsh I spoke of her earlier. The quality is incredible. It just does not go with my room whatsoever. So now I have to figure out how to get rid of this monster. eBay could do the trick, but I have no idea how to ship such a high quality rug (not to mention, it weighs as much as a baby elephant). Craigslist would be awesome, because then maybe someone would come pick it up from me. But do people buy high quality things on Craigslist?? I just have no idea.
2013 was a tough year. I just don’t know how else to put it. For the first half, it had all the makings of becoming a promising, normal year. Then it’s like things just went downhill from there.
The worst day of my life happened in 2013. It was a cold night in November when my grandfather passed away. He was a second father to me. My brother and I spent a lot of our childhood growing up at our grandparents’ house. We always lived down the street and even until he died, I went to his house at least once a week. He couldn’t walk in his later years, so he didn’t like to leave his house very much. He did come to my new-old house one time. My husband and my dad had to carry his wheel chair up the front steps, because my house isn’t handicap accessible from the street. I know that he hated that, but he did it for me. He used to ask me how my house was doing, and he would say “your house is older than me!” (my grandfather was born in 1929, my house in 1925). His favorite color was red. He was a Navy veteran, and the last time I talked to him was 2 days before when I called to tell him “Happy Veterans Day!” He was buried in a beautiful ceremony at the National Cemetery for his overseas service during the Korean War. His grave stone says “He loved God. He loved his family. He loved his country.” And he did.
Along with losing my grandfather, other family members have passed away, and close friends are fighting serious illnesses in 2013. We are also seeing the end of a marriage in my family in 2013. I know that there will be harder days to come in my life, and I know that God doesn’t put us through anything more than we can handle. I am so thankful for my dear family and my patient, loving, supportive husband. I know that God gave us one another to help us through the hard times and to share in the good times in life.
I am thankful that God brings joy, even in pain. In 2013 the bond with my immediate family has been strengthened, and there is closeness with my extended family that I didn’t have before. I also appreciate life in a new way. I think when we lose someone special, everything in life becomes a little different, and the important things in life separate themselves further from the rest. I look forward to taking these positive things into the new year. I’m hoping that 2014 brings more good times than hard times, but whatever may come I know that love and faith gives us the strength to make it through. So sayonara 2013, I do not hate to see you go. Welcome 2014!